look no pants
I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Randomize
