home. puking in laundry basket.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
