Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
