can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
Randomize
