Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize