it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize
