I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Randomize
