How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
