Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
