we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Randomize
