Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Randomize