How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
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