but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize
