I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
Randomize
