NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
