We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
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