glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Randomize
