my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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