Heybabeimwearingurpanties
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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