im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
high people should be assigned attendants
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Randomize
