yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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