Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
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