I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
