Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
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