Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
Randomize
