3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
Randomize
