I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
I'm drive I can fine osifer
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
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