The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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