I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Randomize
