It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
