Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
