Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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