Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Randomize
