why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
