is your mom at the bar?
so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
Randomize
