There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
