Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
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