i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
