Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Randomize