are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
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