it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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