I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Randomize