I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Randomize
