he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Randomize