is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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