Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
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