We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I think we might need a safe word for this...
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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