She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
