yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Randomize