She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
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