i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
