Porn is love you can see.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Randomize
