oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
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